Life With Hetalia
by singer22498
Summary: A huge grin formed on my face. Units! Hetalia Units! They were going to arrive at my house, and I was going to LIVE with them!
1. Prologue: Agriculture

Life with Hetalia

Prologue: Agriculture

My breath quickened as I watched my mother's car pull away from the house and drive off without me. A grin stretched across my face and I stifled a giggle. My mother, my brother, and even my father were all gone for the entire weekend, and they had let me stay home alone. _Alone for the weekend!_ I thought excitedly once again.

"This will be the best weekend ever!" I screeched to nobody, my loud voice filling the house and bouncing off the walls. My puppy jumped with fright from the ground and waddled toward where I sat, staring at me with his cute little eyes.  
>"It's just you and me now Bubba," I said to him, rubbing his black fur with a free hand. "We can do whatever we want! I can go on the computer and write, watch any television I want, talk to friends, ignore chores; I can call Maddi! She could come over and mom wouldn't know a thing, right?" Bubba stared at me with a confused expression, and I laughed at myself. I was talking to a black lab that had no idea what the heck I was saying.<br>"Maddi," I agreed silently to myself, taking out my cell. Looking through my contacts, I walked over to my mother's computer and began to look through my email.

"You've got mail!" The browser screamed at me, making me turn down the volume. A large pop-up box appeared on the screen as I scrolled through my inbox. I began to ignore it, until one word caught my eye: Hetalia. With careful eyes I read the box:

"HETALIA UNITS, NO COST, FREE SHIPPING, BY FLYING MINT BUNNY INC. TIME IS RUNNING OUT, GET IT NOW!"

The timer read 0:15 seconds before my mind began to work again. Free Hetalia stuff, at my fingertips! What's the risk? I thought to myself, clicking the button. Once filling out my address information, fake name, and fake age, a purple screen popped up as well.

"Thank you for your time! You will get your packages shortly, over the course of a few days. The clue to your first unit is… agriculture!"

My eyes went wide as I knew which unit I was getting. A grin spread across my face and I looked down at my own well-endowed agriculture.

Ukraine! I was going to get a Ukraine!


	2. Chapter 1: Making Bread

Chapter One: Making Bread

My fingers fluttered noiselessly above the keyboard, my mind straining as I struggled to type. I had to get this poem done, but I was stuck. My thoughts wandered restlessly, lingering over the Hetalia pop-up. It had only been an hour since then, but I could hardly sit still. My eyes lingered on the front window as I waited for my unit to arrive. _I can't wait to tell someone! _I screamed in my head, grinning. Weirdly enough my dog looked over to where I sat and I smiled.

"What do you want?" I asked in my cutest baby voice. He cocked his head to the side and trotted toward my feet. Rolling my green eyes, I saw my cell sitting on the ground at my feet. It was vibrating so I crouched over to look at my new text message. It was from my mother, of all people.

"You alright honey?" It read, "Brandon's camp is getting extended, and I'm letting him stay until Tuesday. I might not be back for a while, so text me if something goes wrong okay?" I sighed and texted back that I was okay and telling her not to worry, grinning as I realized I might be alone until Tuesday. _That would be epic_, I thought happily. After sending my reply, I looked at my cell and one name popped into my head: Maddi. Searching for her name in my contacts, I called her up.

"Hey," Maddi answered, sounding bored. I quickly cut to the chase. "Hey, you need to come over!" I said cheerily, biting my lip and staring out the window. Maddi's mom and brother were also gone for the next few days, and that was perfect. She could walk over to my house, since it was only two blocks away, and we could have a sleepover and have so much fun!

"Hold on." Maddi murmured, cutting through my thoughts. I sighed and slumped forward in the desk chair, running my free hand through my long blonde curls. My doorbell rang a few seconds after that, and I shuffled to the door. The bell rang three or four more times before I wrenched open the door, determined to give the idiot a piece of my mind. Instead, my eyes grew wide, and I almost dropped the phone.

"Maddi you have to come here now!" I screeched into the receiver, staring at the small white package labeled "Yekaterina Braginskaya Unit". The flying mint bunny logo was patterned on the side of the box, and the unit's manual lay stacked on top. "Maddi," I screamed into the phone once more before realizing that she had hung up. Groaning inwardly but unable to contain my smile, I gingerly brought the box inside, setting it on the hard wood floor in my kitchen.

I read the manual as fast as possible, reading only the parts I deemed important. Creeping toward the box I settled for trying to open the lid. Keeping my voice low, I tried to figure out what to say.

"Uh… I'm a friend?" I said it like a question and rolled my eyes, mentally face-palming myself. Standing away from the box, I waited with growing anticipation. The bouncing sound of her breasts alerted me as she struggled to climb out of the box, and I watched her and beamed. Blonde short hair, blue overalls, agriculture; Yekaterina was just so dang cute! Her eyes flitted around the room before resting on mine, and she gave me a shy smile.

"Who are you?" She asked, cocking her head to the side. "Where are Ivan and Natalya?" I gulped, wondering what to say to her.

"Uh… well they aren't here yet. I'm Lexi… you are like, living with me now, okay?" I gave a shrug and frowned. She stared at me for a moment before I stepped behind her slowly and began to reprogram her. Once I was done, she sighed.

"You can call me Irina, Lexi. Am I really allowed to live here now?" Her voice was soft and unsure, and I laughed.

"Yeah, of course you can." Irina bit her lip.  
>"This is a nice house." She said, walking around the room. I walked beside her, trying not to seem too clingy. Inside my mind, I was screaming out loud. I watched her for a moment more before jogging quickly back to her box, where I saw all of her things. Smiling quickly at her family portrait, where Russia and Belarus looked so dang cute, I carried the box into the kitchen, where she had wandered. When I got there, I couldn't believe what I was seeing. I was sure I had only been gone a minute or two.<p>

The counters were bright and shiny, the dishes stacked neatly next to the sink. Ukraine was sprawled out on the floor, scrubbing the hardwood floor with a wet rag. I bit my lip and cleared my throat, which made her jump.

"Oh, sorry Lexi, I was just trying to straighten up for you before we go to bed. It's dark out you know." I couldn't help it, my mouth dropped and I started to laugh, my body shaking with the spasms of my chuckles. Irina humped and began to get up, crossing her arms over her large chest.

"What?" I asked lightly, not liking the firm expression on her face. She looked like my mother!

"Where am I going to sleep? You need to go to bed, and so do I." She stared at me with eyes that made me want to smack her silly, but I restrained myself.

"Uh, Irina, I'm the boss here; this is my house." I tried to make my voice sound firm, failing more and more with each word as my tone wavered. She laughed and gave me a scary look that had me cringing.

"Sleep is good for you Lexi. Let's both go to bed, _now." _The tone she used reminded me of my mother when she got pissed. Getting a little pissed, I began to tap my foot with impatience.

"No, I'm not tired." Before I knew it, Irina had stomped over to me, and she kicked me, actually _kicked me. _"Ow!" I shrieked and jumped back. My foot clumsily slid on the sleek wood, and I fell to the ground with an audible thump. To my surprise, Irina began to laugh hysterically.

"Are you okay? Get up and let's go to bed!" She chuckled and began to exit the kitchen.

"Fine," I grumbled angrily. Trying to calm my anger, I stood up.

Carrying the box of Irina's things up the stairs, I turned into my room. I placed the white box on top of my green dresser, conscious of Ukraine climbing up onto my bed and making a permanent place for herself.  
>"Hey Lexi," she said, saying it like a question.<p>

"Yeah," I replied, grabbing my pajamas and walking into my closet to change. It didn't matter that we were both technically girls; I didn't want to strip in front of Ukraine.

"I like your breasts." She said is so casually that I almost choked at the awkward silence that followed.

"Uh… what do you mean?" I decided to reply, walking out of the closet as I finished dressing. Crossing my arms over my chest, my eyes flitted aimlessly around the room.

"You have big boobs, obviously." She replied, snuggling into my purple silk sheets. "I do too. We are alike." Nodding my head, I proceeded to get into my bed next to her.

"Uh, let's go to sleep." I replied awkwardly, settling into my sleeping position.

"Goodnight Lexi," Irina whispered yawning. I sighed and wondered what would happen this weekend.

Which unit would I get next?

"Matthew," I prayed silently before falling asleep.


	3. Chapter 2: This is Why You Knock

Chapter 2: This is Why You Knock

The sound of clanging metal filled my ears as I woke up, shocking me into an upright position.  
>"Ukraine..?" I mumbled sleepily, struggling to open my eyes. With fumbling fingers I threw off my sheets and proceeded to stumble out of my room, raking my other hand through my ratted mess of blonde curls. Shuffling as fast as I could down the hall, I misjudged where the stairs were. My foot hit the wall next to the stairs and I stumbled down the steps, my limbs flailing as I half-grabbed the railing. With a loud yelp I landed at the bottom of the carpeted death trap and cried silently at the bruises beginning to form on my behind. The pounding of footsteps alerted me of Irina's approach, and I struggled to stand up.<p>

"Lexi, what did you do to yourself?" She clicked her tongue, scolding me like a young child I mumbled a half-reply before racing into the bathroom. My hair looked like a whirlwind of tangles and my pajamas were torn and ruffled. _What the hell happened last night? _I thought, fearing the answer. The tears were a result of my usual tumbles down the steps on mornings like this, but I was guessing Irina was enjoying her snuggling with me. I made a mental note to get her a separate room, especially because I was going to get a new unit soon.

"Oh-my-gosh!" I yelped, running to the front door. My new unit could come at any moment! Outside was snowy and clear, which made me frown. Proceeding to the kitchen, I saw Irina dealing with the source of banging that had awoken me.

Irina stood in the middle of the room, crying hysterically. Pots and pans littered the floor and soapy water soaked the tiles.

"Lexi, I'm so sorry!" She screamed, tears streaming down her face. "I'm going to clean this up immediately, don't you worry! Can you forgive me?" She continued to blubber incoherently as she cried, and I couldn't help laughing. Irina stared at me for a moment before stomping over to me. "What's so funny?" she half-sobbed. Still laughing, I struggled to look her in the eyes with a straight expression. She was just like I had imagined!

"Irina, I'm not mad at you! I forgive you-"The sound of my doorbell ringing cut me off, and I raced to the door. Yanking it open with all of my strength, I spotted the big white package and pulled it into my arms while blocking my dog with my legs. Strangely enough, he had avoided Irina all throughout the night and this morning, and she didn't seem to mind her. Laying my eyes on the package, my heart skipped a beat.

**MATTHEW WILLIAMS UNIT, FLYING MINT BUNNY INC. HANDLE WITH CARE. **

"Canada!" I screeched, hugging the box with my arms before tearing it open. The next thing I knew, I was sitting on the floor with a strange pounding in my head.

"Oh I'm so sorry!" A small voice peeped, "I thought you were America." Blinking for a few moments, I saw Matthew standing awkwardly next to his box, holding his Mr. Kumajirou above his head like a weapon. I licked my lips, taking in his appearance. His little curl was just so dang cute, and I couldn't help staring at him, uh, vital regions.

"It's okay, I'm Lexi." I stuttered, unable to take my eyes off of him or wipe the grin off my face.

"Lexi, who's here?" Irina bounced into the room, a pan of bread in her hands. Matthew studied both of us for a moment before replying, "Hi Lexi, I'm Matt. Where am I, may I ask? Oh, and who is your friend?"

"Irina, uh, would you like anything, Matt?" Ukraine said, raising her eyebrows. Matt bit his lip.

"Uh, do you have pancakes? I'm kind of hungry." Irina nodded and hurried to the kitchen. Matt sighed and stared at her as she walked away, which gave me the opportunity to program him. I let Matthew roam the house while I deposited his stuff in my room, next to Irina's box. Venturing to my closet, I bunched up two sleeping bags and laid them out carefully next to my bed. It wasn't top class for guests, but they would do. Making my way back down the steps, I went to the kitchen, searching for my new guest.

"Where's Matt?" I asked Irina, who was busily cooking pancakes on a griddle I didn't even think we owned. She shrugged, "I think I saw him go upstairs. I thought he was with you."

"Matthew, where have you gone to now?" I moaned, pounding up the stairs. He wasn't in my room, or my mother's, or the laundry room of death (thankfully). Proceeding to the bathroom, I opened the door and my mouth dropped.

There he stood, completely unclothed, a pair of maple leaf pajama pants in his hands. I wasn't looking there though. My eyes were glued to Toronto.

"Oh, sorry!" Matt yelped as I stood there, staring at his vital regions. Covering it with his pants, I wanted to yell for him to stop, but I didn't. His eyes lingered down my form as we both stood there, motionless.

"Well, uh, I'm going to take a shower… see you in a few Lexi." Matt awkwardly deposited himself into the shower, and I slowly exited the room. My cheeks were bright red, but I was so strangely happy. Sighing, I leaned against the door in triumph.


End file.
